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Author: P.A. Kane

Local

Awaiting Assignment In Purgatory Jack Conrad Mixes It Up At St. Peter’s Gate

June 1, 2023April 4, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

St. Peter’s Gate, Purgatory—Having transitioned from the earthly to the spectral plane, South Buffalo legend Jack Conrad is mixing it up with the crowd awaiting permanent assignment at St. Peter’s …

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Local

Byrd House Restaurant In Orchard Park Welcomes Conceal Carry Firearms

May 20, 2023June 3, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Orchard Park, NY—The Byrd House restaurant located on N. Buffalo Street in the business district of Orchard Park recently started to welcome patrons who feel the need to be in …

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Local

Local Woman Complains About Husband’s Indifference A Month Ahead Of Birthday

May 19, 2023June 20, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Blasdell, NY—Yellow Freight shipping manager Lulu Latoris is annoyed and full of complaints at her husband Larry’s indifference to her upcoming birthday. Latoris, who was born June 24, 1964 starts …

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Local

A Moment Of Silence For South Buffalo Legend Jack Conrad

May 12, 2023June 20, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—The flags at Buffalo Mud are at half mast as we mourn the unexpected passing of South Buffalo legend Jack Conrad. I first became aware of Jack from the …

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Local

Local Author Concludes It’s Impossible To Hate Tom Hanks And He Fucking Hates That

May 4, 2023June 20, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Upon learning that movie icon, Tom Hanks, who the New York Times dubbed: An avatar of American goodness, had written both a book of short stories and now a …

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National

Tucker Carlson Spends Quiet Weekend Tanning Testicles With Don Jr. and Don Lemon

April 29, 2023April 30, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Bryant Pond, Maine—After his abrupt ouster from Fox News at the beginning of the week right wing host Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson is spending a quiet weekend tanning his testicles …

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Sports

Western New York Football Fans Worried About Josh Allen’s Pending Bachelor Status

April 20, 2023May 21, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—This past weekend Josh Allen’s longtime girlfriend Brittany Williams unfollowed the Bills quarterback and took down all the photos of them together from her Instagram page leading to speculation …

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Arts/Living

Rock-n-Roll Board Of Governors Strips “Kid Rock” Of Title: Will Be Known As “Just Bob” From Now On

April 6, 2023September 7, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

New York—Sitting at the table in the Chelsea Hotel on 223 West 23rd Street, where Lou Reed made out with David Bowie in 1973, the Rock-n-Roll Board of Governors voted …

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Arts/Living

Random Text Message Inspires Local Man To Experiment With His Butthole

March 30, 2023October 11, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Niagara Falls, NY—Bobby Beancobb was at Sunglass Hut in the Factory Outlet Mall in Niagara Falls a couple of weekends ago trying on a pair of aviators when he received …

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Local

Republican Candidate Chrissy “CaBoom” Casilio Goes Full “Homina Homina” Trying To Explain Right Wing Posts

March 23, 2023October 11, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Clarence, NY—Sporting a stunned “Who me?” expression and looking around for her daddy—Clarence Supervisor Patrick Casilio—Republican candidate for Erie County Executive, Chrissy “CaBoom” Casilio went through Jackie Gleason like “homina …

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Recent Posts

  • Buffalo Ex-Patriot Prepping For Grind Of Floating Season
  • Study Finds Western New Yorkers Think About Josh Allen Two Hundred Seventy-One Minutes Per Day
  • Local Author Electrifies All Four People At Last Event Of The Year
  • Local Author To Pursue Work Of Devastating Power And Beauty
  • Oasis Promises Continued Bickering, Melees And Possibly A Death During Massive World Tour

Recent Posts

  • Buffalo Ex-Patriot Prepping For Grind Of Floating Season
  • Study Finds Western New Yorkers Think About Josh Allen Two Hundred Seventy-One Minutes Per Day
  • Local Author Electrifies All Four People At Last Event Of The Year
  • Local Author To Pursue Work Of Devastating Power And Beauty
  • Oasis Promises Continued Bickering, Melees And Possibly A Death During Massive World Tour
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