Buffalo Mud Writers Flummoxed Trying To Top The Every Day Crazy Shit Carl Paladino Says


Buffalo, NY—The authors of Buffalo Mud are experiencing some real brain freeze trying to top the crazy shit real estate developer and House candidate for NY23, Carl Paladino says every day. Normally, the talented Mud writers can find a fun and ironic angle to bite at newsmakers. Not with Paladino though, he truly is like the crazy uncle who makes inappropriate comments about your new girlfriend’s ass at the family Fourth of July party or explains in great detail how the Jews control Washington after that second glass of Mogen David wine at Thanksgiving. 

Paladino is poised to gain the House seat and embarrass the shit out of people of Western New York after receiving the endorsement of his sister in crazy, House leader Elise Stefanic R-Saratoga County. The level of embarrassment for Western New Yorkers will likely reach Texas Rep. Louie Gohmert heights. Gohmert you might recall recently complained that you can’t even lie to Congress or the FBI anymore without the threat of going to jail.

The seat up for grabs in the August 23 primary is being vacated by Chris Jacobs. His support of very modest gun legislation in the wake of mass shootings in Uvalde, Texas and here in Buffalo, was seen as disqualifying in the conservative district and by New York Republican Chairman, Nick Langworthy, who is also running for the seat.  

Flummoxed Mud writers are pulling out all the stops. After reaching out to both Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert who were just as clueless on how to deal with the lunacy of Uncle Carl, they are now trying to channel history’s greatest satirists Jonathan Swift, Voltaire and Mark Twain by way of a Ouija board—speak to us masters of the past.     


Buffalo Mud publisher P.A.Kane said, “Paladino hits for the cycle: hypocrisy, conspiracy, misogyny and racism. Plus, when you call him out for any of these things he becomes the victim. He’s like a racoon that rolls around in the garbage from a can he just tipped over spewing hate and insanity—from calling Michelle Obama a gorilla to sharing claims that mass shootings, like the one in Buffalo that left ten people dead, are false flags to help Democrats.”  

If that wasn’t enough, a radio interview from February 2021 on Buffalo’s, Fascist 930 WBEN, has recently resurfaced where he peddled the good side of Adolf Hitler, referring to him as a “doer:”
“I was thinking the other day about somebody had mentioned on the radio Adolf Hitler and how he aroused the crowds. And he would get up there screaming these epithets and these people were just — they were hypnotized by him. That’s, I guess, I guess that’s the kind of leader we need today. We need somebody inspirational. We need somebody that is a doer, has been there and done it.” 

Dispirited Mud writers said its become rather cliché these day to call someone a Nazi, but asked what you do when a viable candidate for the House of Representatives like crazy Uncle Carl sees genocidal maniac Adolf Hitler as a guy who can get things done—an Elon Musk type without the bad mustache? The group agreed they didn’t see how any of this might be ironic or funny. They did however think it was embarrassing, sad and terrifying.