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Tag: Buffalo Bills

Local / Sports

Bills Fans Can’t Wait For The Heartbreak Of Another Season

August 10, 2023August 11, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Pittsford, NY—As we make our way through the dog days of summer the heads of Bills fans are spinning with visions of MVPs, Championships, and Super Bowl parades. News articles, …

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Local / Sports

After Terrible End To Bills Season Local Man Checks With Cardiologist Before Jumping On Sabres Bandwagon

January 26, 2023January 27, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Coming down from a terrible Bills playoff loss to the Bengals last weekend, Zub Norkwood, a sixty-one year old lifelong resident of South Buffalo decided to pay a visit …

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Local

Local Man Receives Forty-Seven Calls On “National Blame Someone Else Day”

January 19, 2023January 20, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—”National Blame Someone Else Day” occurs on the first Friday the 13th of every new year and Harold Mantang, a thirty-nine year old production manager at the Ford Motor …

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Local / Sports

Longtime Bills Season Ticket Holder Questions Commitment Of Fans In His Section

January 12, 2023January 13, 2023 - by P.A. Kane

Orchard Park, NY—Lloyd Crackleknob, a Bills season ticket holder since the Kay Stephenson era has become disillusioned with the commitment of fans in his section. Over the years Crackleknob has …

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Local

For Billionth Time Twitter User Urges County Executive Poloncarz To Stick Something In His Ass

December 1, 2022December 14, 2022 - by P.A. Kane

Erie County, NY—On November 23, 2022 Erie County Executive Mark Poloncarz tweeted out a picture of the environmental impact statement (New York State Environmental Quality Act) regarding the Buffalo Bills …

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Local / Sports

Area Man More Convinced Universe Righting Itself After Second Straight Bills Loss

November 13, 2022November 14, 2022 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Many Western New Yorkers will wake on Monday morning feeling the effects of a second straight Bills loss. Some will think about resuming an old cigarette habit, others will …

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Local / Sports

Local Man Asserts Bills Loss First Step Toward Righting The Universe

November 10, 2022November 13, 2022 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Many Western New Yorkers woke up Monday morning after the Bills loss to the Jets thinking about resuming that old cigarette habit or just calling off work and binging …

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Local / Sports

Williamsville Astrophysicist Temporarily Leaves NASA To Follow Bills

October 21, 2022October 21, 2022 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, N.Y.—Twenty-nine year old Astrophysicist and Williamsville native, Dr. Nicholas Knocklinger has decided to take a temporary leave from NASA, where he heads up a team interpreting images from the …

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Local / Sports

Local Anti-Vaxxers Are Standing With Cole Beasley In Spite Of His Man Bun

July 31, 2021August 5, 2021 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Vaccine hesitant, freedom loving Western New Yorkers are standing with outspoken Bills wide receiver Cole Beasley in spite of his absurd man bun. Under different circumstances it might be …

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Arts/Living / Sports

Area Mental Health Professionals Overwhelmed With Questions About The Bills

September 12, 2020September 13, 2020 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, New York—With the Covid 19 pandemic building steam for a second wave . . . with unemployment at ten-percent . . . with tensions from racial unrest surging . …

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Recent Posts

  • Local Author Taking Temporary Leave To Pursue “Baywatch Silver” Project
  • Local Musician Feels Incredible Anxiety And Judgment From Lou Reed Postcard
  • Sloan Man Releases Treasure Trove Of Millard Fillmore Fan Fiction
  • Leak Reveals John Bolton’s Intrepid Mustache Planning To Knock Trump Out Presidential Race
  • Ten Rumors: Bills First Round Draft Pick Dalton Kincaid
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