Tea Party Budget Hawks Have Other Shit To Do Now
Erie, Pa.—The headline made me sick to my stomach—especially with a Republican heading the goverment: “US Budget Deficit Shatters Record. “ How had we taken our eye off the ball? …
Read MoreAuthor: P.A. Kane
President Trump Seeks Advice On School Reopening From Mr. Kotter
Washington D.C.—This past week President Trump retweeted a post from game show host Chuck Woolery saying the media, the Democrats and the CDC are lying about Covid 19 to block …
Read MoreLocal Man Heartbroken To Learn Children Plan To Throw All His Shit Away After He Dies
Buffalo, NY—John Fleederhosuer, a seventy-nine year retired UAW machinist was shocked and heartbroken to learn that upon his death his two grown children plan to throw all his shit away. …
Read MoreNative American Protesters Told To “Go Home” By Trump Supporters At Fourth of July Celebration
Mount Rushmore, South Dakota—Ahead of a campaign style celebration at Mount Rushmore this past Fourth of July weekend supporters of President Trump called on protesting Native Americans of the Sioux …
Read MoreJack Eichel Reveals He’s A Juggalo: Bummed Summer “Gathering” Is Cancelled
North Chelmsford, Massachusetts—Buffalo Sabres star forward Jack Eichel revealed this week he is a fan of the hardcore hip hop duo, Insane Clown Posse (ICP)and considers himself a Juggalo. Following …
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Fired Sabretooth Happy To Be Moving On
Buffalo, NY—Overlooked in the Buffalo Sabres dismissal of twenty-two employees this past week, which included General Manager, Jason Botterill, his assistants and scouting staff, along with Chis Taylor and his …
Read MoreSenior Citizen ANTIFA Members Step Forward With Message: Don’t Fuck With Us!!!
Buffalo, NY— Earlier this week President Trump retweeted a report by @OANN suggesting 75 year-old Buffalo protester, Martin Gugino, who was pushed to the ground by police and was bleeding …
Read MoreKenmore Man Learns To Be Himself By Loving Night Ranger
Kenmore, NY — My name is Robert Ravenclaw and in 1984 I was thirteen years old. Both of my parents worked, and every day my two best friends, Dewy and …
Read MoreIvanka Quietly Looking For A Girlfriend Ahead Of November Elections
Washington, D.C.—First daughter Ivanka Trump is quietly looking for a girlfriend ahead of the November elections. With the United States experiencing the world’s highest infection and death rate as a …
Read MoreIn An Open Letter West Seneca Resident Discloses Ethical Lapses To Town Watchdog: Al Petko
West Seneca, New York — Dear Al Petko,: My name is P.A. Kane and I, along with my family, have been West Seneca residents since 1994. At the end of …
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