Local Author Catches The Eye Of Tiffany Trump At President’s Farewell


Washington D.C.—Local author P.A.Kane, the 1.5 millionth ranked most popular author on Amazon, was among tens of people who attended President Trump’s farewell from Andrews Air Force Base in Washington last week. From the Egg McMuffin table Kane caught Tiffany Trump’s eye while she stood on the side of the stage with her step-sister and brothers and their spouses as her father gave his final remarks as president. 

Kane received the invitation for the farewell despite being a vocal opponent of the President, not only during his time in office, but dating back to when he first heard the boorish business man run his self-aggrandizing mouth in the 1980’s. But the promise of Egg McMuffins and being there as Trump flew away from four years of American carnage was too much for the author to resist.

Catching his breath between sandwiches, Kane barely heard the soon to be former President repeat the same old lies about the “greatest economy,” with “numbers” that were “at a level that nobody had ever seen before.” or the one about “the “largest tax cut and reform in the history of our country by far.” Trying to be funny and ironic Kane started a USA, USA, USA chant. 

While the chant didn’t last long it did gain traction with a few other attendees of the farewell. Harold and Lorraine Shroggy of Lincoln, Nebraska, out on bail for their part in the Trump inspired coup attempt on January 6th enthusiastically joined Kane in the chant. Marilyn Hovenfoot from Sioux Falls, South Dakota who was brandishing a “Women For Trump,” sign joined in as well, but was greatly disappointed when the chant faded away just like the promise of a border wall or the end of Obama Care or the scourge of Covid 19, which was magically going to disappear. 

After Trump’s remarks the family: Don Jr, Eric, Ivanka and the spouses stood solemnly by their father with dejected faces as their latest grift ended. Kane, however, received a long thankful look from a misty eyed Tiffany Trump for his enthusiasm. Over at the McMuffin table again after the ceremony, Kane signaled for Tiffany to join him and when she did he was ready with half unwrapped sausage McMuffin.

Local Author P.A. Kane

Smiling, she asked , “How did you know I like the sausage McMuffin and not the regular one?”
“A man just knows these things,” Kane responded suavely.

An impish grin remained plastered on Tiffany’s face as Kane explained his support for Biden and his less than stellar numbers as an author. He also said,  later in the year he expects a further dip in his popularity when he releases his first ever book of poetry. 

“Oh my god, my father will hate a loser like you. Will you call me . . . please?” she asked with a pleading tone.

Kane agreed to call her but made Tiffany promise NOT to fall in love with him. After pausing for a moment she promised that she would do her best.

The two are scheduled to talk in the near future.