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Author: P.A. Kane

Arts/Living

Friendship Strengthened As A Result Of A Number Two

March 13, 2025March 13, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Niagara Falls, N.Y.—Driving down Military Road toward their house on 77th Street, Fiona Friesendorf turned to her husband, Finn, who was at the wheel of their Toyota, Tacoma, and informed …

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Local

Local Author Wins Extreme One-Footed Dance Contest

March 6, 2025March 8, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Key West, Florida—Local author P.A. Kane was at the Speakeasy Inn and Rum Bar sipping a fine twelve-year-old Appelton Estate Jamaican rum when an area one-legged pirate named Silver Teeth …

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Local

Local Man Hurt Girlfriend Doesn’t Think About Him When He’s Not Around

February 27, 2025March 25, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Snyder, NY—Wendell Wussman of Snyder was hurt to find out his partner of eleven years, Jill Jeroffsky, almost never thinks about him when he’s not around.  This came to light …

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Local

Benny, At The End Of The Bar Is Stepping Up The Bullshit

February 20, 2025April 14, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Benny Bleetner occupies the last bar stool at Molly Maguire’s daily from 4-9pm and recently has stepped up his bullshit game. He had grown tired of all the nonsense …

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Local

Transport Driver Endures Hours Trapped In Vehicle Set To WBEN

February 13, 2025February 16, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Enterprise-rent-a-car transport driver Kurt Kurchacha was trapped in a vehicle tuned into MAGA 930 WBEN this past Friday. Kurchacha, a retired dance instructor at Rosalita’s Salsa Studio, endured several …

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National

Space X Intern Demands U.S.A.I.D. Reports Ahead Of His 11pm Curfew

February 7, 2025February 7, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Washington, D.C.—This past weekend, Elon Musk’s, DOGE team of six engineers moved to dismantle the United States Agency for International Development (U.S.A.I.D.). U.S.A.I.D. administers American soft power overseas in the …

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Local / Sports

Even The Grim Reaper Is Depressed After Bills Latest Loss To The Chiefs

February 1, 2025February 2, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Following the Buffalo Bills latest playoff loss to the Kansas City Chiefs in the AFC Championship game, the Grim Reaper swept through Western New York and called home fifty-seven …

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Local

Local Woman Crushed Boyfriend’s Initial Call Was Prompted By The Shape of Her Ass

January 25, 2025January 25, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

I-77S, United States—Dawn Deitrich and Dave Dornsfinger have been in a relationship for fourteen years. In a moment of spontaneity, the couple decided this week to escape the freezing Western …

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Local

Nobel Prize Winning Local Author P.A.Kane Fully Embraces End of Social Media Fact Checking

January 17, 2025January 18, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Meta chief executive Mark Zuckerberg announced last week an end to fact-checking on the company’s various platforms, including Facebook and Instagram. To ensure maximum freedom of expression and speech, …

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Local / Sports

Area Loudmouths Prepare Bills Collapse

January 12, 2025January 15, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Skills familiar to many Western New Yorkers include negotiating a snowstorm, finding a good fish fry, and breaking tables after finishing a twelve-pack. Western New Yorkers also know how …

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Recent Posts

  • Seeing Nephew In Jets Gear, Uncle Paul Mobilizes Intervention
  • Music Snob Pisses Off Bar Playing “Gary’s Got A Boner” By The Replacements Thirty-Seven Times In A Row
  • On Fortieth Birthday Father Informs Son He Must Either Get Serious About World War II History Or Smoking Meats
  • Mailroom Guy Annoys The Shit Out Of Coworkers With His Mock Drafts
  • Trump Declares Victory In Coloring Contest, Egg Roll—Calls Kids ‘Major Losers’
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