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Author: P.A. Kane

Arts/Living / Local

Area Teachers Preparing For Heavy End Year Drinking

June 21, 2025June 22, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Western New York—As the school year comes to a close this week, area teachers are not only creating summer reading lists, grading exams, and buttoning up classrooms, but also are …

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Local

ChatGPT Deems Local Author’s Appearance: “More Compelling Than Stereotypical Hotness”

June 5, 2025June 6, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Local author, P.A.Kane was putting together a flyer to promote his latest book, “Larry Plumb Is Still Here.” When he showed his wife the picture he intended to use, she …

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Local

Love Triangle Throws Pickleball League Into Disarray

May 29, 2025May 30, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—At the end of St. Casmir’s fall pickleball league in Kaisertown, ballroom dance instructor Pepper Parabola underwent knee replacement surgery. In addition to her longtime boyfriend, Tim Trapizoid, helping …

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Local

Local Woman Finds Clarity And Healing Through Self-Care

May 22, 2025May 23, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—This week Buffalo State English professor Sandra Swillobee ended her eighteen-month relationship with arborist Glenn Guildinspruce. To reduce the sting of this heartbreak, Swillobee has employed self-care techniques for …

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Local / Sports

Seeing Nephew In Jets Gear, Uncle Paul Mobilizes Intervention

May 15, 2025May 16, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Rockland County, NY—When he came across a photo of his three-year-old nephew, Parker, sporting New York Jets gear on social media, Uncle Paul copied it and sent a WTF?—text to …

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Local

Music Snob Pisses Off Bar Playing “Gary’s Got A Boner” By The Replacements Thirty-Seven Times In A Row

May 8, 2025May 9, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

South Buffalo, NY—Before attending a show at The Caz this past Saturday night, Norbert Garfunkel, his wife, and their friends the Nolandorfs stopped at the Dog & Pony Saloon for …

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Local

On Fortieth Birthday Father Informs Son He Must Either Get Serious About World War II History Or Smoking Meats

May 1, 2025May 1, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—Larry Lighthouse Sr. congratulated his son Larry Jr. on reaching the milestone of his fortieth birthday. He told his son that he had become a fine man and was …

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Local / Sports

Mailroom Guy Annoys The Shit Out Of Coworkers With His Mock Drafts

April 23, 2025May 11, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Buffalo, NY—The internet and high-speed computing have become a pervasive part of life across the globe. Right now, sitting in the pockets of billions of people is a handheld computer …

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National

Trump Declares Victory In Coloring Contest, Egg Roll—Calls Kids ‘Major Losers’

April 22, 2025May 3, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Washington, D.C.—While markets tumbled precipitously Monday, President Donald Trump participated in the White House’s traditional Easter Egg Roll and Coloring Contest. Like at his Doral Golf Club, where he recently …

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Local / Sports

Masters Officials Block Lockport Man With “Practice Round” Pass From Teeing Off

April 17, 2025April 19, 2025 - by P.A. Kane

Augusta, Ga.—In June 2024, Bucky Bergen, an underwriter at Basil Toyota in Lockport, purchased a “Practice Round” pass for last week’s Masters Tournament at the famed Augusta National Golf Club. …

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Recent Posts

  • Snyder Man Stuggling To Hide His Red Neck Past
  • Local Bartender Bracing For Weekend Of Lame Irish Revelers Hitting On Her
  • Buffalo Ex-Patriot Prepping For Grind Of Floating Season
  • Study Finds Western New Yorkers Think About Josh Allen Two Hundred Seventy-One Minutes Per Day
  • Local Author Electrifies All Four People At Last Event Of The Year

Recent Posts

  • Snyder Man Stuggling To Hide His Red Neck Past
  • Local Bartender Bracing For Weekend Of Lame Irish Revelers Hitting On Her
  • Buffalo Ex-Patriot Prepping For Grind Of Floating Season
  • Study Finds Western New Yorkers Think About Josh Allen Two Hundred Seventy-One Minutes Per Day
  • Local Author Electrifies All Four People At Last Event Of The Year
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