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Month: December 2024

Local / Sports

After Thirteen Straight Years of Christmas Sabres Tickets, Amherst Siblings Want to Know Why Uncle John Fucking Hates Them

December 26, 2024December 27, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

Amherst, NY—For the last thirteen years, John Jackinjoff has gifted his nephews Jimmy( 21) and Joey (23) Jackinjoff Sabres tickets at Christmas. This year, however, when the nephews found tickets …

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Arts/Living / Local

Hallmark Channel Options “Bad Ronald” Christmas Story

December 20, 2024December 20, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

Los Angeles, California—Executives at the Hallmark Channel have optioned a made-for-TV Christmas movie featuring Punk716 frontman “Bad Ronald.” The script and story were written by local author P.A.Kane, and is …

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Local

Local Man Improves Mental Health Barking Back at World Like His Dog

December 13, 2024December 18, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

Lackawanna, NY—Recently, Tommy Tinsel, a CSX train engineer, has been observing the barking patterns of his dog, Kaya Francis Bean. Since his wife of sixteen years, Terri, left him for …

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National

Moon Unit Zappa Rebuffs Trump’s Overtures to Head Space Force

December 6, 2024December 6, 2024 - by P.A. Kane

Mar-A-Loco, Fl.—Seeking to diminish the intense blowback over the controversial cabinet nominations of Robert Kennedy Jr. at Health and Human Services and Pete Hegseth at the Department of Defense, President-elect …

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Trending

Seeing Nephew In Jets Gear, Uncle Paul Mobilizes Intervention

May 15, 2025May 16, 2025

Music Snob Pisses Off Bar Playing “Gary’s Got A Boner” By The Replacements Thirty-Seven Times In A Row

May 8, 2025May 9, 2025

On Fortieth Birthday Father Informs Son He Must Either Get Serious About World War II History Or Smoking Meats

May 1, 2025May 1, 2025

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Recent Posts

  • Seeing Nephew In Jets Gear, Uncle Paul Mobilizes Intervention
  • Music Snob Pisses Off Bar Playing “Gary’s Got A Boner” By The Replacements Thirty-Seven Times In A Row
  • On Fortieth Birthday Father Informs Son He Must Either Get Serious About World War II History Or Smoking Meats
  • Mailroom Guy Annoys The Shit Out Of Coworkers With His Mock Drafts
  • Trump Declares Victory In Coloring Contest, Egg Roll—Calls Kids ‘Major Losers’
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